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Monday, March 14

A Pound of Flesh.....

This morning after leaving the pool area at the Y, I gave into temptation and hopped on the scale. I'm always a little curious about the magical numbers the scale will come up with.

Its all a conspiracy, you know. Those numbers don't actually mean anything. They are randomly selected by the little fairy people who live inside the platform we stand on.

If the stars are aligned and the fairy people are pleased, they will send out little, happy numbers. If you have told a lie in the last 24 hours, and forgot to throw salt over your shoulder, the fairy people below the scale platform become angry with you and the numbers they spew out are very large and frightening.

Its all very scientific and I haven't got time to explain it all right now.
However, I stopped getting on the scale at all about 3 monthes ago. Apparently, I had done something to anger the fairy people and they were putting very LARGE numbers onto the scale. Through no fault of my own (its the tiny people I tell you!) the numbers kept going up, even as I exercised more and more...it was a cruel and vicious cycle and I was TRAPPED!!!! TRAPPED I say!

No matter what scale I stepped on, the same LARGE numbers kept popping up. Those fairy people have an intricate system of communication, and they would always be one step ahead of me.

Anyway, today I thought I would take my chances after 3 monthes of ignorance regarding the magical numbers. Well, I stepped on the scale, and I looked and I looked again. With my shocked look of disbelief I began to fidget with the dials, when 3 other women in the change room noticed my panicked state!

All three women spoke at the same time, "Yeah, that thing did the same thing to me. Its way off! You can't trust THAT scale. Totally off!"

See my point? Every single woman lives in a fantasy world when it comes to the scale. Those things are completely arbitrary, and they spew out random numbers. They are not to be trusted. At least my fantasy was theatrical and interesting. I didn't just come out and call the piece of machinery a liar!

I did the mature thing and blamed it on the fairy people!
Erica at 4:04 PM

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