Off We Go...

We're off to the lake for a week and a half.
Hooray for the beach!

Questions are Annoying...

My kids have a lot of questions. (wonder where they get that from?)
They question everything I do and say...why, why, why!!!!
Mostly its a good thing but there are times when it is very annoying.

I'm glad God is not as irritated with me as I am with my kids.
(at least I hope not)

I'm glad there is a place for questions that is healthy and safe.
Lately I really relate to words from this song...

What is it that keeps the elders falling on their faces?
What is it that keeps the creatures crying holy, holy, holy?
What is it that keeps the cherabim, serafim and the angels in order?
Won't someone please turn on the light?
God, please turn on the light.

See?
I'm not the only one with questions.

Aw Shucks...

A couple weeks ago I got to babysit my cute little nephew who is six months old.
He soooo cute!!! Check him out...

Thoughts on God...

What if God is loving to everyone because that is how He is, and there is no connection AT ALL to our behaviour?

What if there is no relationship between my behaviour, my intelligence, my understanding of God or my kindness to other people and how much God loves me?

What if God just loves people...just because?
Period.
End of sentence.
End of truth.

If these things are true, what does that mean about all the conditions I've been taught my whole life about how to get God to love you more and all the sermons I heard about how to please God?

I'm not talking about an allowable free-for-all in human behaviour with no consequences because God is a loving chump. The idea that God is forced to forgive me because He is trapped in some kind of cosmic "unconditional love pact" He made with Himself does not only limit God into a little box of human comprehension, it also makes Him less than omnipotent.

I'm talking about the "rules" I've learned to live by, to please God and to please people. My behaviour hasn't changed at all, I'm still outwardly good because old habits die hard.
However, I question my motivation about everything lately.

Why would I construct my life around a goal (getting God to love me) which I've already attained?
It doesn't make sense.

So if I am already loved by God as much as I ever will be...what now?
Can we all (me and God) just relax and have a drink?
Can we put aside all the pretenses (stop pretending) and just have a chat?
Wouldn't that be nice?

I'd think I'd love to have tea with God, aware of both my sin and His grace. I would like to rest, not fearing the tension between sin and grace but knowing love will overcome just because.
Just because love always overcomes. I would like to speak without "prayer talk" and talk about my thoughts and feelings, as small as they may be in comparison to divine knowledge.
If the atmosphere is divine, and I tell the truth as I understand it, it doesn't feel wrong and its still true even though it is wrong and untrue. There is something about an atmosphere devoid of judgement that can allow human truth to withstand divine wisdom without conviction, yet be corrected into divine truth.

When He speaks, this is what I would want out of the conversatin.
I would like my "pretended holiness" to be thrown into the sea, never to be seen again while I listen to real holiness.
I want to hear holiness, and let it seep into my soul so I will laugh and cry and see things.
I want to be like wind. I want to hear and let truth wash over me and then let it go.
I don't want to grasp at the straws of prophetic impressions and try to build a human empire based on snippets of momentary spiritual truth that blew through the air one season.

I can't trap God. I've tried. He won't stay where I put Him.
He is always moving, and my understanding of Him is structured and stuck.
Can I learn to be transient? I can I move with the seasons? What if it means there are days, or weeks or months where there is nothing tangible to hold on to? What if the only evidence of the wind is the wind or the scent of faith blowing through your heart?

Letting go of structure is hard.
Letting go of religion is harder.

Definitive Generosity???

I have been the last few days about the idea of generosity.
As usual, in my ponderings I've only come up with questions...

What is generosity really?
It can't be just giving, can it?

If you give something but you can afford to give it, is that still generosity?
ie. I can afford to buy someone lunch at Wendy's without missing the money, it really isn't costing me anything. But what if I wanted to buy someone a 5 course meal at an expensive restaurant, and I had to do without in order to treat them...does that count as generosity because it costs me?

It is the cost that makes it generous or not generous?

Or is it the intention that counts?
Lots of businesses give because it makes them look good in the eyes of the public...is this still generosity, even though it has a self-centered interest at heart?
Charities would suffer without corporate sponsors...so there is value in it...but is it generosity of heart or a just a tax right-off?

Is generosity defined by the gift, by the thought, by the intent of the heart, by the amount?

This might sound like a stupid question to some, but I've really been thinking about this and wondering how to teach generosity to the youth I work with, and to my kids. In thinking about this, I must first define it for myself before I can teach such a concept.

My second thought is this, isn't the best way to learn to be generous by experiencing generosity yourself? Should I just give and hope they will follow my example? What would be a good incentive for a teenager to want to be generous to another human being (especially those who feel like the whole world is out to rip them off)???

Questions, questions, questions....

Milestone Day...

Goodbye 20's
Hello 30's

It is my birthday and I am 29 no more!
I think I am okay with that.

Rebecca graduating from Pre-School.

My big girl is now on her way to Kindergarten.

Another Formula...

For anyone who has read my blog for an extended period of time will have noticed my affinity for "scientific" proofs and equations. eg. eating cold ice-cream actually burns calories

Well, me thinks it is time for another formula. (Since it apparent from two posts back that I have all my spelling and grammar undercontrol, perhaps I should work on my math skills)

Here is the new formula:

LT + BK = (LT) (LT)

LT = Length of Time it takes to do anything
BK = You decided to Bring the Kids along

Basically, you take the length of time it takes to do anything.
eg. Go to the store to buy an apple, takes 20 minutes including travel time.
LT = 10 minutes
Now you decide to bring the kids along for the trip, you take the length of time and square it.
10 X 10 = 100 minutes.
It will now take you 100 minutes (an hour and a half) to go the store and buy the apple.

Proof: LT = 10 minutes a) grab purse, lock door and get into car = 1 minutes
b) start car, drive to store = 2.5 minutes
c) get out of car, enter store = .5 minutes
d) pick up apple in produce and pay cashier = 2 minutes
e) start car, drive back home = 2.5 minutes
f) exit car and unlock house door = 1.5 minutes

Proof LT + BK = 100 minutes
a) grab purse and ask children to put shoes on = 1 minute
b) chase child who thinks its funny to take purse and run = 4 minutes
c) help child find shoes = 8 minutes
d) child puts shoes on while you find car keys = 3 minutes
e) take shoes off and put shoes on the correct feet = 5 minutes
f) get kleenex for tears of sad child crying about shoes on wrong feet = 3 minutes
g) ask if anyone needs to go pee-pee before we go = 1 minute
h) both children take off shoes to go pee pee on the potty = 2 minutes
i) children bicker over who gets which potty = 2 minutes
h) children go pee = 6 minutes
i) child goes poo and needs help wiping = 2 minutes
j) children return to door and put shoes on again = 7 minutes
k) open door and realize its raining, children start to take off shoes = 1 minute
l) argue with children that they don't need rubber boots = 1 minute
m) realize its quicker to just let them put on boots = 1 minute
n) children put on rubber boots = 2 minutes
o) children wail that they can't walk out with umbrellas = 1 minute
p) search for second child's umbrella which was hidden in the closet = 3 minutes
q) walk out of house, lock door = 1 minute
r) in flurry of umbrellas leave purse in house, return for item = 4 minutes
s) put kids into car and start up vehicle = 3 minutes
t) referee argument about who gets which seat = 4 minutes
u) explain why we have to wear seatbelts = 4 minutes
v) back out of driveway, stop and try to remember where you are going = 4 minutes
w) drive to store = 5 minutes (including stop to pick up dropped sippy cup)
x) get out of car and explain (again) why we hold adult hands in parking lot = 5 minutes
y) find shopping cart that isn't wobbly and put kids into the cart = 8 minutes
z) go to produce section and pick up apple = 1 minute
A) pick up 16 apples dropped on ground by child disturbing apple pyramid = 4 minutes
B) go to cashier to pay for apple = 1 minute
C) explain why we are buying an apple, not gum = 2 minutes
D) purchase apple and return to car (leaving kids in cart) = 3 minutes
E) drive home = 2 minutes
F) walk into house with bruised apple which hit the ground when children fought over who's turn it is to carry the shopping bag to the car = 1 minute

So as you can see by this scientific proof, the formula works. It really does take 100 minutes to buy an apple if you include the kids in the shopping excursion.

You can apply this equation to numerous different things.

Walking to the post box down the block takes 3 minutes?
Bring the kids, it will take 9 minutes!

Driving to the video store to pick out a video takes 20 minutes?
With the kids, it will take 400 minutes! That's correct, it will take 6 and a half hours to get a video...the formulas works! See for yourself!

Doing a load of dishes takes half an hour? 30 minutes becomes 900 minutes. Yes, it will take you 15 hours to do the dishes if your children are around. And even if you can manage it in less time, it will still seem like 15 hours!

With those examples, I will end this post. It is time for me to go begin writing a new math text book. Its going to be called Mommy Math.

I will use this math formula in high schools around the country as part of the health curriculum, as a means to prevent teen pregnancy.

"You wanna get pregnant, well consider this...you like doing your nails? How long does that normally take you? An hour? Well guess what honey??? If you have a baby it will take you SIXTY hours to do your nails!!! Oh, you like spending 40 minutes on your hair??? If you have a baby, you might as well shave your head because its gonna take you 26 and a half hours to get your hair done with a baby in the picture so just forget it! A word to the wise teenagers, learn the formula, memorize it and it could save your life!!!"

Soundtrack...

When I was in university I took a "rubber" course because I had a heavy course load.
Definition: rubber - an easy elective to provide a credit without a lot of work eg. Basket Weaving 101

The Course Title was "The Enjoyment of Music". It included biographies of composers, the basics of music theory and defining musical terms. Much of it included being able to listen to music and understand the technical side but also interpret the emotion of the music. My children could get an A in the later part.

Yesterday, while driving in the van, I was trying to get them to fall asleep so I set the radio to CBC Radio 2, which plays classical music.

They spent the entire time listening to the music and shouting out what the music brought to mind.
When the music was slow and soft - "This is the part when I am dancing"
The music is bright and quiet - "Okay, this is where I wake up"
Fast music with deep, bass - "This is when people are being chased by a wolf!"

They never did fall asleep, but they did have creative stories to match the soundtrack each new movement in the music brought to mind. It was very entertaining to listen to them.

Playing Spell Checkers...

Eye hav knotizzed ass off lait that mie goud phrend Sin-dee-lou haz nawt bin cominting on mye blawg?
Ujaly, shee comints wen i macke a mustaik inn spelin ore inn gramer;
Mie rightin muss bee getin mutch bedder cuz shee. Aint maid eny comints inn a lawng tyme!

Eye wundir iff shee wil comint on thiss poste,

Family Reunion...

We all know that summertime is family reunion time, but that kind of joy is coming early this year.
I am very excited that my little brother will be home for a visit and my mom will come home to visit shortly after that. Those thoughts bring a smile to my face lately. I love it when my whole family is together.
I have a fun, loving and fun-loving family!
I miss it when we are not altogether.
So...YAY for family!

Overheard At Breakfast Table...

R: Do you know why I'm eating Raisin Bran?
I: Because its healffy?
R: Correct! And do you know why its called Raisin Bran?
I: Because it has raisins and its brown.
R: That's right! Good job Bella, you're a smart girl.

Raisin Brown.
Hee hee

May I See Some I.D.???

Most tribes and nations around the earth have certain naming ceremonies when a child is born, some when a child is conceived. Some cultures have more than one time in a person's life when a person receives a name. Usually the ritual involves some thought as to the child's personality, identity in the tribe or purpose in life.

The names that are given are also rich in meaning, they are not just words on a certificate to distinguish one person from another. Remember 'Dances with Wolves'? Every person had a name that described an attribute of their personality, it meant something and held a piece of their identity.

How about this?
Genesis 17:15, 16
'God also said to Abraham, "As for Sarai, your wife you are no longer to call her Sarai; her name will be Sarah. I will bless her and surely give you a son by her. I will bless her so that she will be the mother of nations; kings of peoples will come from her."'

Sarai - means quarrelsome in Hebrew
Sarah- means my princess in Hebrew (that's quite a step up from Sarai)

God made a promise to give some serious purpose to Sarah's life, and not only that, He changed her name so that everybody who ever met her would verbally announce a part of that divine purpose.
Everytime she met someone new and they said, "Hello Sarah", they were actually saying, "Hello My Princess". Daily reminders of who she was to God, and of her purpose on earth.
That should make a person feel valuable, no? (Actually no, she laughed and said "yeah right! I'm too old to have a baby).

Wouldn't it be cool to be named something that:
a) was ordained by God (and therefore accurate in terms of your true identity)
b) reflected who you are to others
c) helped you understand your own identity

I looked up the meaning for Erica. There are various meanings listed - Ruler, Rules Forever, Royal or Honorable Ruler.

Many days I'm just like Sarah, I say "Yeah right! As if that's who I am! Maybe my parents got it wrong. How could I be worthy of such a name?" Do I just need a deeper understanding of what my name means? Do I not understand my purpose in life? Do I need a new name?

Lately it seems the answer to any question I have is just another question...what do YOU think of me God?